i'm a brat. let's be honest though. you are too.

I've seem to have had several arguments that have ended with the other person telling me they're not perfect. As if this is the answer to everything we've just been fighting about. But that's not an answer, it's a fact.

No one is perfect.

And no one should expect someone else to be. But there's a difference from hiding behind imperfection and continuously working on being a better person. To know you have things to work on and you choose not to is almost as bad as saying that you're perfect in the first place. No one should be above addressing their shortcomings, righting their wrongs, if for no one else but themselves. But few people take criticism well, me included, and no one wants it pointed out. But if the person I am now is the only version of the person I'll ever be then what am I doing? I'm never gonna meet anyone new? Or do anything different? I'm going to listen only to myself and never see things from a different point of view? I should be ok with who I am now, because I'm imperfect and that's just who I am, period?

Ummm...no....

My older brother has recently pointed out that I am bullheaded. To which my immediate reaction was to say, 'No, I'm not.' And obviously he's right, I am bullheaded or at least can be. As in what I say goes. Like when I say, I don't want to talk about it or I don't want to do it, he and my family knows that I'm not going to talk about it and I'm not going to do it (yep, even at 27 this brat side of me still comes out) no further discussion. I know I'm like this but now I know that this may hurt them, which is something I never want to do. I do like to think things through before speaking (usually!) and that means if I'm put on the spot about something, my initial reaction may be to shut down or defy it. They know it's not something that'll change in me overnight or ever all the way, but I want to alter it enough so as not to hurt them. It's not easy and sometimes, I feel like my family is a pain in the prying ass but what's more important, making an effort for my family or being stubborn for selfish reasons?

So few things annoy me more then someone saying to me, 'that's just how I am', I'm not gonna change. Like that's it. You're never gonna ever be different? You're not gonna even TRY? Smells like bullshit to me. Because if you're the exact same person you were five years ago, ten years ago time must've stood still for you. If I was the same person I was five or ten years ago, well, that'd be a whole other set problems in and of itself. So when someone says something that ridiculous, I want to be like, well no shit that's how you are...but do you think that makes everything you do ok?

Everyone makes mistakes. Has regrets. Everyone has said things they don't mean. If someone I care about doesn't like something I'm doing, I know it's less about me as a person and more about my actions, actions that can be changed. Sometimes people think they can't change who they are, but they confuse this with not wanting to. All it takes is time and trying. And if you're so above giving it time to work on it or trying a new perspective, then I would rather hear that.

Own up to it.

Just say you don't want to change for anyone. That you are above it. You're too scared. You're too lazy. Because at least there's the truth. Because at the basis of my annoyance with someone who makes the 'never gonna change' excuse is that that person is lying. They will change. When the time is right for them. When they do own up to it, their fears or reasons for not wanting to budge. Whatever it is that's holding them still. They lie because it's easier. Gives them more room to screw up. They are just fine. They forget no one is asking for perfection. They forgot what it's like to be and want more.

They forget what it feels like to try.